My book is my mind and lost are my thoughts.
Lost in thinking if i will ever work my mind out!
It is not undocumented that my relationship with my one remaining living grandparent is not fantastic.
To feel so low about someone you should rate so highly is heartbreaking.
For many years iv got on with it, took the insults, took the bitching, took the irrelevant comments, took the pain or ignored what was going on right under my nose.
Its funny, of all the things, of all the times she made me cry, this was not one of them.
Ive walked away. A massive step for me.
Iv lost out on many lovely things that should have been.
I always stick by these people when everyone else has long gone, but there is only so many times you can get the knife stuck in your back before you realise, if you don't run now, that knife will never ever be removed from your back. You will always be scarred.
My lost thing is not lost. I never had it.
I never set out to leave, i never set out for it to end like this but that's the way its happened and for once, I'm glad.
Im the one that always felt lost.
I don't feel guilty anymore, i feel free.
Sometimes you need to let go to see if there is anything to lose.
I don't have any grandparents. they all died many years ago and i can not tell you how hard it is for me to come to terms with that, any grandparents who i feel anything for are long gone now.
it is so hard to let go, but sometimes the only thing that we can do. well done.
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