Teenage pregnancy - our decision or societies?

From an early age people make a decision not to be another teenage mother statistic but is this really a statistic or is a choice forced on us depending on the upbringing we have or the area we live in?

It is easy for any onlooker to think that it is irresponsible to get pregnant at an early age but it is becoming a choice many people seem to choose to do.

What ever your choice, after all is said, it should be the right choice for you.

I am neither for or against teenage pregnancy but i am against going in with no Praia experience or knowledge on the subject. The same thing gos for parents of any age. I'm not an expert and all i no on the subject is common knowledge.

Money/benefits/social housing:

To presume that every single or unemployed parent is on benefits is shameful and how uneducated you are. Yes most of them are due to having no other way out. If you were offered money and you were struggling, you would take it to, same goes for a house. That said there are many parents who are single and work and raise a family often without the help of the dads or social. There are also single parents who can't afford to work. After watching a documentary it was shocking to find that to some single parent it pays to stay at home, After taking in to consideration child care costs and arranging fetching children etc. to only come back with £10 extra, or sometimes less money than they would get in benefits, is madness and no one in there right mind would do it. I also agree that if you don't have the money, house,flat, help to have kids, then don't have them.

Underage sex:

Were do i start?

I feel so strongly about this due to reasons very few people no. If you or i were to steal from a shop..you would quiet rightly expect to get arrested because you have broken the law, regardless of your age. If you kill someone, age no object, you would expect to at least get arrested because that is law... but if you have sex under the age of 16 and you get yourself in the papers or brag about it at school, nothing happens. all because both parties are under the age of 16, even if by only a few weeks. This is outrageous. Who can honestly tell me that two 15 year old's who have been having sex for months, maybe years and totally no that they are breaking the law, should not be arrested? This under minds our justice system. My point is not that I'm either for or against underage sex, my point is to follow through with our laws. This gos for any crime not just underage sex, if you set a law, follow it trough.

In other places across the world you are told that sex is bad from a very early age and that you shouldn't do it under any circumstances. When these people reach an age when they understand the people who told them this were saying if for there own good,they are also at the age to make a decision to do it or not to do it.

I love this idea and I'm all for it, these kids would not dare do it, some do, but only a fraction of the amount of kids who do it here and due to the stigma of it, they often have an abortion.

Something to love:

When i was younger i had a really bad mental breakdown and at my lowest point i hadn't come out of my room in 3 weeks. Even at that low point i would never have dreamt of bringing a child into the world to cure my insecurities or help me get over my problems. That is totally unacceptable but when some of these people are asked *why* they did it, that is there answer. I wanted something to love. If there were better counseling in schools and the right help out there for people, that's people or all ages not just teens, then less of these kids would be born into lives full of misery and depression, this sets these children up to fail and in turn bring a child into the world just like there mother did with them, giving us generations of unhappy, depressed families.

Fashion:

to have a baby as a fashion accessory you can drop at nursery is unacceptable. A family member once worked at a nursery for many years a really passion of his (yes a man). He loved his job but after seeing no end of women from all walks of life drop off there 1 week old baby for nursery eventually wore thin with him and he could no longer carry on. Older women who had told him about there battle to have children, thousands of pounds worth of treatment and there desperation to be like the rest of the people at the park pushing nice pushchairs and dressing there babies in designer clothes, Would drop of there, fashion accessories that they craved so much, at a nursery just days old.

How can these women justify this?

He didn't see many teens but the few he did see were often very unattached, people who didn't want there baby's and would place them in the nursery as there way of coping, giving them back there life and freedom for the day.

abortion:

I am neither for or against abortion but after hearing Heidi on big brother say "abortion is the best form of contraception"

scared me but it is what some people do.

This is wrong again on so many levels and wile i think that if you were ever to be unlucky enough to feel you need an abortion, you should be aloud.

i also think you shouldn't get pregnant with this in mind. You should never leave it to nature knowing that if all goes wrong, abortion will sort it all out.

older mums:

I was one of the selfish people who rushed to the conclusion that there all the same and they never think about the children, just about themselves. I was proven wrong, these people have so much love to give a child which is why they are so eager to have one. I do not agree with women over the age of 60 - not one bit, its wrong on so many levels. but women who still have energy,love and time and are still able to run around after them are no better or no worse at looking after a baby then young people. people may argue that the wont see there child grow, but no one noes what will happen tomorrow, any mum can die at any age at any time. I did hear of a women who had a baby but was so old she couldn't pick her up, that i do not excuse, that's out of order and dam right horrible for all concerned, especially the child.

The people who decide not to:

there are women out there who decide never to have children, Some by choice, others due to age, money, time, love. There are women out there who have built there career first and ultimately left it to late to have kids, but Rather than be selfish and have a child at a late age, they simply don't have any at all. There are others that due to the reasons mentioned in the above paragraphs, money,home,love,time, they chose its better not to have them. People also chose not to have children if they think there own problems will mess there children's life's up.

Does were we live effect anything?

wile it seems many pregnant teens are in one area than the other, i personally feel it falls down to education. If you were brought up in a rich family were you have many opportunities and prospects then you are less likely to fall back on a family and have a baby for the sake of your own happiness. If you live in a poor area, were you get bored easily and see many other young,poor,teens around who drop out of school due to behaviour or the lack of motivation to educate themselves and get themselves to a better life and place, you are probably more likely to go along with it and have a child to have something to love because you feel there is no other way out anyway, so why bother with education when it leads no were.

I feel that very few use it as a way to get a house but for thous who do, its very sad!

after all this is said, and you weigh it up people say all a baby need is love, How wrong. Yes that's a main tool for parenting but you need money,time and effort. To have a baby and presume your going to get everything handed to you on a plate is wrong. but to have a baby and get no support at all is wrong.

The bottom line for me is regardless of weather you chose to have a baby or not, make sure it is a choice you get to make and not a choice you are forced to make by becoming pregnant by accident.